


Finding your safe spot

by greeny1710



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Seb and Kimi are Max's protective paddock dads, Seb just wants to wrap the baby drivers up and protect them, TW: Self Harm, is this me working through my problems by torturing Max Verstappen?, not actually on page assault but Max talks about it, tw: panic attack, tw: sexual assault, you're damn right it so
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-02
Updated: 2019-12-02
Packaged: 2021-02-17 22:29:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21650806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greeny1710/pseuds/greeny1710
Summary: Sebastian sees Max running through the paddock and wants to protect his young driver*pls check tags before proceeding :)*
Relationships: Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen, Max Verstappen & Sebastian Vettel
Comments: 23
Kudos: 204





	Finding your safe spot

**Author's Note:**

> so
> 
> this is a thing
> 
> **THIS DEALS WITH SEXUAL ASSAULT AND MENTIONS OF SELF HARMING. IF YOU MISSED IT IN THE TAGS DO NOT READ IF THAT AIN'T GOOD FOR YOU**
> 
> I wrote this back in like March?? And yeah it was a result of me trying to work through and cope with an assault thing happening to me but at the hands of my friends boyfriend. I told people, and their response was 'well he was drunk so you can't blame him' (except my best pal, she was ready to throw hands bc she a gem), hence why I have Seb being a protective Dad who tells you that no means no . 
> 
> The calming techniques Seb uses on Max are actually techniques that I use with my best friend when they are having a panic attack, distraction techniques and babbling are things that really help both of us, so I was writing from personal experience there.

He couldn’t breathe. His hands were shaking as he clutched his phone, his arms and legs pumping faster than he’d ever moved them before. He had to run away, he had to get away from that place. He needed to get away from _him_.

———

Sebastian saw a flurry of movement and heard the pounding of feet sprinting past him as he exited his motor home. Looking in the direction of the noise, he saw Max running away from the direction of the garages, away from something. From the looks of it, Max was distressed and Sebastian swore he could see him shaking. 

On instinct of protecting the young driver, Sebastian took off after him, flying between people as he kept Max in his sight. He could vaguely hear Kimi shouting his name, but he just kept going, every fibre of his being telling him to go and look after the young driver. Sebastian was suddenly incredibly grateful for the amount of work his trainer put in to making sure his stamina stayed up as he realised just how fast Max could run. 

Sebastian managed to catch up to Max when he slowed down to catch his breath, kneeling down and pressing his head into his hands. He could see Max’s shoulders shaking as he took in ragged breaths and what Sebastian could only assume were sobs. They were hidden away from the public and most of the other drivers and staff behind one of the motor homes, and Sebastian was grateful that he could try and comfort Max without him fearing of being noticed.

“Max?” He murmured, slowly approaching him, “Max, are you alright?”

Max’s head shot up and he spun around, falling over as he pushed himself away from Sebastian. He could hear whimpers from Max as he scrambled backwards, causing Sebastian to drop down to his knees as he tried to appear less intimidating to Max. 

“Hey, it’s alright, I’ll stay right here. You’re okay, I’m not going to let anything happen to you now. I just need to check you’re alright, kleiner,” Sebastian murmured. He held his hands out in a comforting manner and slowly moved to sit in a cross-legged position opposite Max. Max watched Sebastian through the tears in his eyes, knowing that Sebastian could and would keep him safe. 

“I feel so dirty,” Max sobbed as he pulled at his hair. A touch at his wrist caused him to flinch and lash out, his brain not processing that it would be Sebastian. 

“Shh, kleiner, it’s okay, I’ve got you,” He told Max, moving gently to hold Max’s hands in his own to stop him from pulling his hair and scratching at his skin. Sebastian could now see the red lines across his forearms where Max had clearly tried to scratch away the feeling of something from touching him. As much as he tried to stay calm so as not to antagonise or panic Max more, Sebastian could feel a slight sense of panic and dread wash through him. 

Max fell forward, falling forward into Sebastian’s arms and sobbing hardly. 

“Shh, kleiner,” Sebastian repeated, not quite sure how to comfort Max but not wanting to let go of him anytime soon, “C’mon, let’s get you up.”

Sebastian struggled into a standing position, holding Max tightly against his side as he held his weight. Max was still sobbing and breathing heavily, trying and failing to get his breathing under control. Sebastian noted this, propping Max against the side of the motorhome and placed one of Max’s hands against his chest and held the other in front of him. 

“Max, just follow my breathing, yeah? Just copy me.”

Sebastian gave him a moment to start doing so, noting that Max was slowly, really slowly, starting to get it under control. 

“Okay, now touch my hand with your other finger,” Max shaking did as Sebastian asked, “Now touch your nose.” 

The corner of Max’s mouth slightly quirked up at what Sebastian told him to do, but shakily did it none the less. 

“And again, touch my hand then your nose. Keep doing it, Max.”

As Max followed the instructions, Sebastian kept his eyes fixed on Max, noticing the tears that were still racing down his cheeks and the heavy, but slowing, breaths. 

“So, Kimi said something funny to me today,” Sebastian stated, “He was supposed to be getting something from the motorhome, and he got dragged into this piggyback race.”

Max kept moving his finger and following Seb’s breathing as he listened, not too sure why Seb was telling him this story but definitely not opposed to listening. Sebastian noticed that as he continued to babble, he was keeping Max’s attention on him and not on his panicked state. 

Once Max had calmed down and his hands were not shaking as badly, Sebastian trailed off and smiled softly at Max. 

“Do you want to talk to me about what happened?”

Max closed his eyes briefly, scrunching them up for a moment as he took in a deep breath. It stuttered out of him, and with a quick glance around, Max nodded.

“But not here,” he told Seb, his voice shaky. 

Gently Sebastian guided Max away from where they were and towards the Ferrari motorhome. Max tucked himself into Sebastian’s side, pushing his head down. As they walked past people, Max whimpered when someone pressed too closely, but Sebastian just wrapped his arm tighter and pushed his Ferrari cap onto Max’s head. The rest of him was dressed pretty nondescriptly, just a plain blue T-shirt and black shorts, no sign of a red bull logo in sight. Once in Sebastian’s room, Max pushed himself away from Sebastian suddenly and ran towards the bathroom, barely getting there in time before he emptied his stomach, fresh tears rolling down the tracks. 

“Oh, liebling,” Sebastian murmured, holding his water bottle in one hand and rubbing Max’s back with the other.

“I just feel dirty,” Max repeated from earlier, sobbing the words out as he clutched Sebastian’s water bottle. “All I can feel is his hands on me, I hate it, I hate it.”

Sebastian’s mind immediately fogged over with protection and anger.

“Who, kleiner, who touched you?” Sebastian prayed it wouldn’t be Daniel, but he wasn’t averse to murdering the Australian if needs be. No one deserved what had happened to Max.

“Mechanic, one of the new ones, I don’t know who he is,” Max stuttered out.

Sebastian breathed a sigh of relief. He knew of the weird little relationship between Max and Dan, a relationship that had never had a name put on it but he knew how deeply Max felt for Dan. He’d seen the same look on Max’s face that he often saw on Kimi’s. But that sense of relief was still clouded by the anger of what had happened. He’d always felt slightly protective towards the younger driver, regardless of the intense battles that they’d had over the years. But now, he wanted nothing more than to keep Max wrapped up in a blanket and protect him from the outside world. 

“C’mon, you have a shower, it’ll do you good, get the feel of it off you,” Sebastian told Max, pulling him towards the shower and turning it on. Max watched the movements, seeing that Sebastian had turned the water temperature up high.

“You can shower by yourself, but I’m going to sit here, and I’m not going to leave you, but I’m not going to watch you, okay?” Sebastian motioned to the floor and waited for Max to nod in acquiescence.

Sebastian nodded back and turned around to slink to the floor. He knew that there was nothing in the shower that Max could use to hurt himself, other than the water and his own thoughts. He heard Max undress and step into the shower, heard the sound of water not pounding so violently against the tiles and instead dripping off Max. 

“I’m going to go get you some fresh clothes, okay?” Sebastian told Max, being careful to push himself up and turn his head ever so slightly so that Max could hear him properly without feeling like he was being watched. 

Max hummed in response, and Sebastian left Max to shower the grime and feeling of someone touching him off. He padded around the room, grabbing a loose t-shirt that Seb was pretty sure had been Kimi’s at one point or other, a pair of loose cotton boxer shorts and also (again probably Kimi’s based on how wide they were) a pair of shorts. Nothing that was tight. Nothing that would rub against Max’s skin. Nothing that would remind him of the touch. 

“Clothes,” Sebastian announced as he held the clothes triumphantly above his head, backing into the bathroom with his back facing Max. Clearly Max had watched Sebastian enter, and Sebastian let out an internal cheer when he heard Max huff out a laugh. 

“Can you pass me a towel?”

Sebastian pressed a hand over his eyes as he turned around. His outstretched arm hit something, making him mutter an ouch, but Max laughed slightly again. Baby steps, Sebastian thought. 

Sebastian passed Max the items of clothing one by one, and when Max had the shirt over his head and said it was okay, Sebastian dropped his hand. He blinked a couple of times to let his eyes adjust to the light. Dressed in the loose clothing and his hair mused from towelling it dry, Max looked every inch the young boy that Sebastian sometimes had to remind himself Max was. Yes, he’d matured rapidly in the last few months, but he was still a boy that never really had a proper childhood. He’d grown up so fast. 

“Want to talk about it?”

Max nodded somewhat reluctantly. Sebastian noticed that Max shuffled slightly on his feet, looking at Sebastian with wide eyes. He raised his arm, watched Max follow the movement, and then barely had chance to catch Max as he dived against his side. 

Sebastian held the weight of Max as he half-carried, half-dragged him through to the sofa. With Max deposited on the sofa and a blanket draped over him, Sebastian dug his phone out of his pocket and sat down next to Max on the sofa. Max shuffled over to press himself against Sebastian’s side, knowing he was safe if Sebastian was there. 

“All I can feel every time I move is him, just the feeling of his hands, everywhere. I hate it, it’s my fault, I should’ve said no louder, I should’ve made him stop.”

“Did you say he was allowed to touch you? Did you ever consent to him putting his hands on you?”

Max looked down, playing with Sebastian’s fingers, before whispering barely audibly, 

“No.”

“No one can do anything to you without you consenting, Max, it doesn’t matter who it is, or what their reasoning is, it doesn’t matter if it’s some fan, or if it’s Dan. Consent exists for a reason Max.”

Max nodded solemnly, tucking himself into Sebastian’s side. 

“What did he do then, this assaulter?” Sebastian asked, running his fingers through Max’s hair. 

Max stiffened up slightly and his eyes squeezed shut. Even after showering, the track marks from his sobbing were still present on his cheeks. 

“I was at the car. Knelt down, I can’t remember why, I was looking at something. And he comes up behind me, pressed his knee into my shoulder and I turned around expecting Dan. He said something to me. I stood up, said something back, and he laughed, and then he looked around the garage as though he was checking no one was there,” Max’s voice cracked and started breaking, and Sebastian’s heart broke with it. 

“And I tried to get away, I said I needed to go find Jake, but he just kept following me, and he kept pushing me back, and he kept blocking me every time I tried to move. And I asked him to move, I really did Seb, but he said I needed-”

Max paused to let out a sob, 

“He said I needed to be nicer, I needed to be shown what a good boy is, I’m too bad, I’m too bad on the track, I’m too bad to the team, he trapped me behind this wall bit, and he just put his hands all over me.”

Sebastian listened for the next however long it took for Max to tell him everything, to tell him about the unwanted probing and stroking and how he couldn’t even look at himself without seeing what that _bastard_ had done to him. Max tended to skirt around the overly graphic details, but Sebastian could put two-and-two together. He knew what Max was saying. He could see everything happening, Max trying to fight, Max trying to get away, Max scrubbing at his own skin as he talked, his nails creating raw red lines up his arms until Sebastian could pull them away, the traces of blood forming under his fingernails. 

“Every time I move, I can just feel his hands touching me.”

“It’s going to stick with you, kleiner. It’s not something that will just go away because you want it to. You did the right thing talking about it, and I’ll be around if you want to come and talk some more.”

Max made a noise of protest at that, seemingly misunderstanding something.

“I’m not chucking you out now, kleiner, no, don’t worry, no. I just mean if you need to talk about this again, or just even come and throw up in someone’s bathroom because someone else made a comment or brushed against you, I’ll be there. You didn’t deserve this, Maxy. No one deserves it. This bastard did something to you that no one should ever have to experience. But you are not the one in the wrong, you are not the one who needs to apologise. You are not a ‘bad boy’ or whatever he called you, you’re a good, special, fantastic, incredibly talented driver, and you’re an even better person. Do not ever think that you aren’t.”

Max’s eyes teared up again as he looked up at Sebastian. 

“Thank you.” He whispered, furrowing close to Sebastian. 

Max squeezed his eyes shut, letting his breathing come back under control, whilst also tightening his arms around Sebastian. 

“I’m sorry for being too aggressive on track, sometimes. I really admire you, and Kimi, I just, I dunno, I just have to keep pushing or my dad-”

“Don’t, Maxy, you don’t have to explain. Your dad is a topic for another day.”

“For another week, you mean,” Max sighed. There were too many issues with his Dad to discuss in just one day. 

“Sleep, kleiner,” Sebastian distracted Max, not wanting Max to spiral even further, “I’ll keep you safe.”

Max’s breath evened out incredibly quickly, Sebastian noticed, and Max fell asleep clutching Sebastian the same way a small child would clutch onto their comfort toy. Sebastian wondered if Max had been allowed a cuddly comfort toy as a child, or if his Father had deemed it too babyish and not allowed his son even the smallest, yet purest, form of comfort. 

Without jostling Max too much, Sebastian was able to get an arm free slightly and lift his phone up, switching it to the camera and snapping a picture of Max fast asleep on him, attaching the picture before sending a message to Daniel. 

Daniel Ricciardo   
  
Got your boy here. He’s had a rough time. Might need some aussie love  
  
omw, what happened?  
  
Talk to Max about that. Not my place to say   
  
be there in 5  
  


True to his word, Daniel turned up not even five minutes later, an old hoodie draped over his shoulder as he shuffled into the room, letting the door drop close behind him. 

“Kimi gave me the key,” He offered as a form of explanation, holding up the white plastic card, “Thought he’d still be asleep, didn’t want to wake him up. He hasn’t been sleeping well. Or sleeping at all, to be honest.” Dan ran his fingers through his messy curls, tugging them slightly as he looked over Max. 

“Maxy, Maxy, wake up, kleiner,” Sebastian whispered, running his fingers through Max’s hair and across his cheeks, gently rousing the sleeping boy. 

“Seb? What’s happening?” Max slurred his words. Sebastian would place any number of bets that Max would be exhausted for the next few weeks, even without factoring in the nightmares. This whole evening would take every inch of power out of Max.

“Someone’s here to see you,” He said as he helped Max to sit up straight. 

Max rubbed his unfocussed eyes, barely able to keep them open for more than two seconds. 

“Hey, Maxy, how ya doin’?”

Max looked up sharply, backing into Sebastian and his safe spot, as he failed to process the voice of Daniel.

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s just me. Just plain ol’ Daniel. I brought you my hoodie, know you like it when you’re sad.”

Max let out a small cry, falling into Dan’s arms and ripping the hoodie into his hands, pressing his face against the soft and familiar smelling fabric as he sobbed, 

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I should’ve come to you, but I was scared, I didn’t want you to be angry.”

“It’s okay, Maxy, I’m not angry, I’d never be angry. You found your safe spot, it’s okay, you’re okay, we’re going to be okay, Maxy. I love you, I just want my boy to be safe,” Dan told Max, rocking Max gently and pressing kisses into his hair. 

Sebastian nodded at the pair of them, knowing Dan had it under control and Max would be okay.

Well, not okay. He wouldn’t be _okay_ for a while. Sexual assault did that to you. It messed with every aspect of who you are, taking that thing that means the most to you: autonomy over your own body. 

But with Dan by Max’s side, loving him (that was something Sebastian was glad to hear) and protecting him, snuggling him and comforting him, Sebastian was sure that Max would come to be able to deal with the situation, regardless of what he did. 

“I’m just going to nip to Kimi, return his key,” Sebastian told Dan and ran his hand over Max’s hair, feeling Max’s head going heavy as he tired himself out with the crying against Dan’s chest. 

Sebastian left his motorhome and headed over to Kimi’s, all the while thinking about the dead-behind-the-eyes look he’d seen on Max at the very start of the evening. Once he reached Kimi’s motorhome, he knocked once before entering, knowing Kimi would ignore the knocking otherwise. 

“I need you to help me ruin someone’s life.”

“I’m interested,” Kimi replied, holding out his arm for Sebastian to fall into his lap. 

Finally, he let all the emotion out he’d been holding in, feeling that same sense of comfort Max was getting from Dan, from Kimi. 

“Max got hurt, badly. And we need to end who did it to him.”

“What’s your plan, kulta?”

Sebastian pressed his lips to Kimi’s. He loved this man. He loved how Kimi just trusted him. 

He could only hope that Max would feel this way about Dan. It was a nice way to feel. 

But no matter what, Seb would be there, ready to protect his newest adoption. He always did think that him and Kimi should get more paddock kids. Charles needed more siblings.

**Author's Note:**

> But yeah, so this was a thing.
> 
> Sometimes you gotta work through your issues and mine are by writing them down so soz Max Verstappen but ily and I project my issues
> 
> But yeah, I've been sitting on this for a while and I wanted to share it. 
> 
> You're not alone and no means no. Every time.


End file.
